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Inspire. Motivate. Laugh. Love….. Your Guilty Pleasure. ♥


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Tribute: To A Phenomenal Woman

Maya2

Maya Angelou 1928 – 2014

 

I know a lot’s been said about her in the last day or so, but it would be a huge injustice if I did not take some time to pay tribute to our dear Dr Maya Angelou.

It was with a heavy heart that I read the news of her passing, having been the one woman who made me want to write in the first place.

I have always been an avid reader, but it was not until, at 15 when I did an English class project on Maya Angelou, that I decided I wanted to try my hand at writing. I remember standing in front of the class, reciting “Still I Rise” with a certain Miss Dionne Song, and recognizing for the first time, the immense power that words have in our world…recognizing their magic working in and through me, and I have never looked back since.

Maya Angelou

Dr Maya Angelou’s last tweet

It was easy to be inspired and motivated with a mentor like Maya, a woman who lived her life to the absolute fullest. She was, after all, an extraordinary human being who managed to touch the lives of millions worldwide through her almost ethereal command of language. Works of fiction, non-fiction, poetry and plays, all textured with depth and wisdom and peppered with her youthful sense of humour. She was unconventional, confident, fearless, graceful, brilliant and a phenomenal woman.

“If you must look back, do so forgivingly. If you must look forward, do so prayerfully. However, the wisest thing you can do is be present in the present… Gratefully.”

During her exemplary life, she breezed in like a breath of fresh air, inspiring millions, teaching the multitudes, trying to help whomever she could and stealing accolade after accolade from those who, unsuspectingly, had underestimated her. Until one day she was able to look back and see titles such as Author, Poet, Singer, Dancer, Director, Playwright, three-time Grammy Award winner, Civil rights activist, Mother & Teacher.

The epitome of what is means to be a real woman, with every facet celebrated and loved, she has inspired me to bolder routes, comforted me in darker times, uplifted my spirits in sorrow, and provided words of wisdom galore.

You will be sorely missed Dr Angelou.

 

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Be inspired to be great.

Be blessed to be a blessing.


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Countdown To Destruction: Day 25

So today, it is officially 25 days to the end of the world and the overall apocalyptic destruction of everything you hold dear.

Don’t look at me like that, you all watched the movie 2012, you know its going to be CRAZY!

 

Before yesterday, I didn’t believe in the aforementioned apocalypse, but since I saw Chris Brown’s “Don’t Judge Me” video, and since Riaan Cruywagen  read his last news cast, I’m inclined to think that something is definately off kilter about the world.

One thing that always bothered me about this prediction was the disparity in the fact that they could predict the destruction of the entire world, but none of them ever pointed out the details or atleast date of their own demise??

It is, of course, the Mayans of which I speak. They are a lost and gone generation now, but once upon a time, they lived, and it seems they had a calendar, that continued to the end of all things, but somehow transversed their own existence…hmmm…okay… Am I the only one who sees the giant gaping hole in this story.

Why would anyone bother dating anything for AFTER their own existence and the existence of the world they knew? Who did they think would be around to ask what date it was? Who did they make those calendars for? Was it not maybe just one huge April Fool’s prank, where one particular Mayan professor kept giggling right to his grave at the thought of the poor sucker who would read his calendar a few decades later and freak out?

But like I said, with all the hurricanes and tsunamis and tropical storms hitting everywhere, and ofcourse the fact that Oom Riaan is no longer on our screens, it seems very possible now that on 21 December 2012, the ground might collapse beneath me.

 

So I have decided to hold my very own countdown to the end.

This might be a good time to start doing all those things that are on your bucket list hey…just saying…

I currently have about 153 items on my Bucket List, as compiled so far, so I guess I left this countdown a tiny little bit too late…perhaps… but hey, I’m a girl with gusto and I can never say I never tried, so lets say I tick off two or three things from my list every day, and I can die with a smile on my face, knowing that I atlease came within a hair’s distance of completion.

Mine for DAY25 are:

    • Learn to play piano
    • Attend a masquerade ball
    • Ride in a helicopter

I don’t know how this is going to happen but hey, you can’t blame a girl for trying right?

So here goes nothing…

See you all on at the finish line 🙂


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Afrikaners panic as Riaan Cruywagen retires

This is the article whose link was posted in the previous blogpost… Courtesy of www.hayibo.com

 

As iconic anchorman Riaan Cruywagen prepares to read his last news broadcast tonight, Afrikaners have begun to panic, saying that he was the only public figure they trusted. “Oom Riaan was all that stood between us and a tsunami of Commie Pommie Moffie propaganda,” explained one. “Did we walk barefoot over the Drakensberg for this?”

Speaking to journalists this morning inside the Cruy-Wagon – a pimped-out mobile home attached to the SABC’s plumbing and electricity, where he has lived since the Jurassic era – Cruywagen said he had many wonderful memories of his life in broadcasting.

“I remember my first story as a young newsreader was the cooling of the earth,” he said, the light from the overhead disco-ball twinkling off his head. “And of course, the asteroid that wiped out the dinosaurs, gosh, we had to scramble to keep up with that one, all that scientific language and graphics and flaming waves of molten lava bubbling past the SABC’s windows.”

Asked if he had any regrets, he said that he would have liked to break into cinema.

“In the early 1980s there were wonderful plans for a Haas Das film set in World War Two,” he revealed. “It was going to be called Haas Das Boot, and feature the rabbit newsreader trapped in a crippled Nazi U-boat. For some reason they couldn’t raise the funding to make it happen.”

Cruywagen said that he was looking forward to spending more time with his family, doing a bit of gardening, and trying out cage-fighting in Burma.

“Oh yes, I’m quite good at cage-fighting,” he giggled modestly. “How do you think I kept my job at the SABC after 1994? I pity that fool in HR who once tried to tell me I was too white, too Afrikaans and too male to read the news. I fed that sucker his ass. Jammer dat ek so vloek.”

Meanwhile, Afrikaners around South Africa have begged Cruywagen to stay on, saying that he is the only person on the planet that they trust.

According to Hempies Hanekom, chairman of the newly formed Committee To Keep Oom Riaan Telling Us True Facts Forever, they were hoping to change Cruywagen’s mind by offering to add him to the frieze on the Voortrekker Monument.

If that failed, he said, they would be forced to staple Cruywagen to his chair in the SABC2 studio.

“Don’t leave us, Oom Riaan,” he sobbed. “Don’t leave us alone in the dark…”


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Oom Riaan Cruywagen

Riaan Cruywagen, South Africa’s own Chuck Norris, is the thing of myths and legends, currently the longest standing person in South African television, he and the Noot vir Noot guy have been competing for what seems like a lifetime, to see who would be the last man standing. Riaan though, is currently winning, seeing as he was most likely the first face South Africans saw on the tube when they saw a TV for the first time!

For years, South Africans discussed, in hushed whispers, how they had been watching Riaan Cruywagen for an immemorable number of years and he still looked exactly the same, so over time, he became viewed the reverence befitting a mystical creature such as he.

Riaan Cruywagen has been a news reader on SABC2 for what seems like a lifetime (in reality, its only 37 years…yes, I said ONLY). The one thing that captured the minds of most South Africans was the fact that he seemed to not have aged a single day since he began (or rather, since you first saw him). I think its safe to say that Riaan was the face that many of us grew up, especially seeing as he was sharing bulletins before you were born.

Unfortunately, Oom Riaan is finally retiring, and these news have been met with a great sadness for all who have been seeing his face every single day since they were in diapers. This was evident in the article written on: http://www.hayibo.com/afrikaners-panic-as-riaan-cruywagen-retires/

His very first broadcast was on this very day (26 November) so I guess it is somewhat fitting that today we are all saying goodbye. Hope Oom Riaan has a stellar retirement, he will be sorely missed.

 

 

  Riaan Cruywagen Facts….

Riaan Cruywagen is fluent in twenty seven of the eleven official languages.

Riaan Cruywagen knows the news before it happens.

Riaan Cruywagen knew you would say that.

Riaan Cruywagen had a telekinetic showdown with Johan Stemmet. After draining all of Stemmet’s powers and rendering him severely retarded, he created Noot vir Noot and made Stemmet the host.

Some people believe Riaan Cruywagen wears a toupee – he does not. Although he is in fact bald – except for one perfect hair… the one that Covers his entire head – giving it that, ‘not quite real’ look. Riaan himself is not quite real.

Riaan Cruywagen was the original model for Michelangelo’s statue of David. Unfortunately, that was in the early years of Michelangelo’s career and he wasn’t yet artistically mature enough to capture the Crywagen essence… he nearly drove himself mad with frustration until eventually he decided to settle for his number 2 choice of model. Chuck Norris was only 3 years old when he posed for Michelangelo.

One night during an ad break on the 8 o’clock news, Riaan Cruywagen mentioned to the makeup lady that he was ‘tired of this apartheid nonsense’. Nelson Mandela was freed prison the next day.

Riaan Cruywagen wasn’t born, he thought himself into existence

Riaan Cruywagen never blinks; if he does the entire world would just not happen for that split second.

When Sir Edmund Hillary reached the summit of Mount Everest, he was welcomed by Riaan Cruywagen, who briefly interviewed him, before wiring the information through to the SAUK.

In binary code the word “Riaan Cruywagen” looks like the shroud of Turin.

When he was three Riaan Cruywagen successfully reinvented the wheel.

Riaan Cruywagen will never die. His soul gets transferred to another identical body via various arcane rituals and current nano-technology thrice fortnightly.

Bruce Willis’ character in Die Hard is based on the unpublished autobiography written by Riaan Cruywagen at the age of 15.

Riaan Cruywagen’s first job was tutoring Pythagoras

After reading the news Riaan Cruywagen built the pyramids. It took precisely 17 minutes to draw up the plans and then a further six minutes to think them into existence.

Riaan Cruywagen doesn’t use a script – he sees everything.